One other Brick In The Wall – Bike Snob NYC

The opposite day I discovered myself driving behind somebody carrying this jersey:

“Penis Worldwide Biking Membership?,” I believed to myself? “What’s that about?” I imply the rider did look fairly penis-like in his flesh-colored jersey and clean helmet, so it made sense thematically, but it surely nonetheless it appeared odd for the jersey to truly acknowledge this. After awhile although I noticed it was really a jersey from Pas Regular Studios:

I couldn’t discover something about their new P(E)N(I)S line, however they do have one other line named after a technical knockout that includes seeing kaleidoscopic colours:

Presumably they need to seize the enjoyable and pleasure of a head damage:

I suppose I shouldn’t be shocked that biking clothes has gone from evoking the sensuality of struggling to full-on concussions and genitalia, although it does make me pine for a less complicated, extra harmless time when this kind of factor was leading edge:

It’s kaleidoscopic, however within the Señor Frog’s approach, not the my-helmet-saved-my-life approach. Nonetheless, if I had to decide on between carrying this or carrying the Penis jersey I’d simply say “Fuck it” and experience shirtless.

Talking of adjusting occasions, I complain rather a lot about how every thing with bikes goes digital. I notice that this principally simply makes me sound like an previous fusspot, however occasionally one thing occurs that vindicates me and my love for analog bicycles, and goddamn does it really feel good:

Oh positive, you’ll nonetheless have the ability to unlock your bike (for now):

However “Will I have the ability to unlock my bike now that the corporate who offered it to me is bankrupt?” is a query you need to by no means, ever should ask your self. Anybody celebrating the truth that digital shifting is changing mechanical and which you could tune your suspension setting with an app ought to ponder that we now stay in an age when even a motorbike can probably be “bricked.” Additionally, this sounds handy:

Theft-proof bolts are nothing new, and I suppose the businesses that make them are additionally liable to exit of enterprise at any time, however you don’t have to pound on the door of a particular retailer that’s now closed if one thing goes mistaken along with your commuter-ified Surly:

Bike corporations can’t determine whether or not they need to copy the automobile corporations or Apple, so they only mix the worst facets of each. I’m wondering if this particular person additionally had wheel locks:

That automobile’s been there for awhile. I’ll have to spring for a pair of those and stick them below there:

By the way in which, if I’m crucial of congestion pricing, it’s principally as a result of I do know the town and state will virtually actually screw it up. In the event that they actually needed to do one thing to rid the streets of automobiles, as a substitute of spending years and years making an attempt to get this factor up and operating, they’d cope with all of the low-hanging fruit they’re already empowered to cope with first. In truth it’s not even low-hanging fruit, it’s rotten apples strewn all around the floor, and we’re ankle-deep in rancid apple sauce:

A fucked-up fraudulently registered automobile shouldn’t be allowed to take a seat in a pedestrian plaza for even a minute. Not paying the meter or parking along with your bumper a little bit too near the hydrant is one factor, however the metropolis ought to have a “the ground is lava” coverage on the subject of shit like this, and if a automobile is sitting someplace the place it doesn’t belong then get tow it the fuck out of there. Granted, I’m positive that is tougher than it sounds, and I bear in mind studying someplace that one cause this doesn’t occur is that there are such a lot of fucked-up automobiles on this metropolis they don’t even have sufficient room to impound them. (Although having been towed myself within the blink of a watch a few years again, I do know it’s actually one thing they’re greater than able to doing once they put their thoughts to it.)

Should you actually need to eliminate one thing then you definitely don’t let it in, or if it’s in already in and inflicting bother you eliminate it. Should you’re superb with it staying so long as you get one thing out of it then you definitely simply hit it up for cash. All I’m saying is that this entire factor smells extra just like the latter to me.